This past weekend I was able to tick off a goal that I’ve been trying to achieve for the last couple of years. I ran non-stop for 5kms. I know that doesn’t sound like much, but it’s a big deal for me

I did it once before a couple of years ago, but then I stopped running and lost all fitness. I’ve tried to do it again a couple of times since then, but had to stop when I broke my foot, and then stalled several times when severe calf pain made it too hard to continue to train.

Here’s what I’ve learned about goals and how my brain and body work this time round.

1. Revisit your goals- I think that I probably stopped after the first time because I failed to adjust my goal after I achieved the first one so that I could keep going.
2. Understand your motivations- I set myself a running goal because I want to be fit and healthy as I get older. Running 5kms once doesn’t fulfill that requirement, hence the need to revisit goals when you achieve them. This will help build momentum.
3. Talking to yourself is good – This is a trick I learned from reading Born to Run . Normally my self-talk when I am running sounds something like: “I’m going to die, I’m going to die, why am I doing this to myself, it would be easier to ride”. Now, if I am not listening to an audio book, I talk to myself like this, “light steps, this is easy, keep going, small quick steps!” The brain is a strange beast, and I’m learning to harness my internal monologue and make it work for me rather than against me.
4. Whole body awareness and core strength is important- when my calves became a problem for my running I tried massage, stretching and barefooting to no avail. A friend suggested drinking more water, but that did little more than make me spend more time in the bathroom. In the end I read something online that made brief mention of calf pain being linked to lower back strength. I didn’t think anything of it at the time, but I have been doing kettlebell workouts 4-5 times a week, which are excellent for building core strength. I am assuming that my improved muscle tone is the reason for the rapid improvement in my ability to run longer distances.

So with that in mind, my new running fitness goal will be to build my distance and register for the Canberra Times Fun Run this year. That’s a 10km race, and will probably take me all day to do! I had it on my list for next year, but it looks like I can bring it forward. Yay! I might register for a couple of other fun runs between now and then to keep me on track too.

Al also achieved one of his goals this weekend. He participated in the Mont 24 hour Adventure Race — a team based mountain bike event. He and five work colleagues formed the “Propeller Heads” team (they are all IT professionals) and rode hard for 24 hours. Al started mountain biking less than a year ago and has trained hard to build the required technical skills and overall fitness level. He was surprised to learn, however, that he developed a great deal more technique very quickly as he raced. His times were impressive and he didn’t stack once!

My take away: Jump in and do it! We learn best by doing!

Al's very dusty bike

Congratulations babe! I am so proud of you!

So far we’ve talked about being totally honest with ourselves when we have questions about our faith, and we’ve had a look at a guy called Thomas who had a hard time believing that Jesus had really risen from the dead. Now I’d like to share some of the strategies I use to work through those curly questions that seem to keep popping up. I’ve created a visual representation in the form of a mind map.

(Click the picture to see a large, easy to read version)

You can’t afford to let questions fester and become a block between you and God (that’s when they do become sins), so get active and deal with them!

A word of warning…you need to be prepared for people to dismiss you, or laugh at you, or tell you to “just take it on faith” without any reasoning. I’m not going to speculate why they would do this, but it does happen from time to time.

Don’t be put off! Do not be discouraged!

Seek the truth and God will honour your honesty and faithfulness!

What other strategies have you used to deal with questions of faith in your life?

Last week I posted about the need to ask questions about our faith in order to grow. Today we’ll take a look at some doubters in the Bible, how Jesus dealt with questions, and what that means for us.

Caravaggio's Thomas

Being a doubter is entirely biblical. Don’t believe me? Here are three notable doubters. The first is King David (Psalms – How long will you leave me? He was always asking God what on earth is going on? ). The next is John the Baptist who when thrown in gaol (Matt 11:2-3) had questions about whether or not Jesus was really the Christ, or if he should await another. The third is Thomas, but we’ll get to him in a moment. In fact, the only ones in the Bible that thought they had it all figured out and were proudly proclaiming the fact were the Pharisees…and look what they ended up doing. They killed the Messiah. Be very wary of anyone who says they have never ever had doubts or questions about their faith. Everyone doubts from time to time.

Back to Thomas.

I think Thomas has been pretty hard done by over the years. How could he possibly doubt the Christ when he was standing right in front of him? I can almost hear you thinking..I bet you would never make the same mistake. Don’t worry you’re not the only one…don’t be a doubting Thomas…why worry when you can pray, right?

If you haven’t heard about Thomas, you can read about him HERE . He very famously said “Nope! I’m not going to believe it is really the risen Jesus until I can stick my fingers in those holes.” It wasn’t as if he was a non-believer, he was called by Jesus and had walked with him for the past three years. They had served alongside one another! And yet, he asked the question.

Thomas had questions and he pursued the answers. He poked and prodded (literally) until he was satisfied with the answers he was getting. He walked away stronger for it.

Was Jesus angry? Absolutely not! He didn’t push Thomas aside or embarrass him or give him a hard time for his perceived lack of faith. Jesus loved Thomas and showed grace and mercy. He gave him exactly what he needed in order to dispel his doubts. He invited him to come close and touch and see, to explore. God will treat you the same, with patient understanding. God won’t give you what you want to prove your faith. He will give you exactly what you need in order to prove your faith.

Thomas is an example for us in how to tackle the questions when they come up. He wasn’t afraid to go directly to the object of his questions for answers, we shouldn’t be either. He wasn’t going to take someone else’s word for it when he could ask Jesus himself what the deal was. We have the same opportunity. God would much rather we were honest. He sees it anyway.

Before that moment Thomas believed *in* Jesus (he had knowledge about the man), now he believed Jesus, he had taken the next step. He chose to trust him, to believe him, to allow that interaction to fuel his next action, which historians believe included missionary work in what is now India.

Sometimes the journey isn’t as immediate as it was for Thomas.

I’m close to a guy like Thomas. He is a highly intelligent guy who asks questions like -

If God is powerful and true who reveals himself, why are there so many denominations all believing different things, shouldn’t we all be believing the same thing?

If there really is a God, why doesn’t he speak directly and audibly to me and tell me what he wants?

Why would a loving God kill someone for working on the sabbath?

How could Noah’s ark possibly be a true story, and why are there ancient manuscripts of a flood story that predate biblical manuscripts?

Why does God seemingly answer car park prayers and not cure cancer or heal amputees?

Why did he let my Christian uncle die young and leave four young kids?

He sought answers for years and was met with everything from outright laughs, to “you just have to accept it on faith”, to people trying to fix his lack of faith. All of this coupled with a grab bag of experiences observing  Christians has brought him to a point in his life where he is unable to reconcile the religious life with what he has come to believe is true about God from a rational standpoint, sifting through all of the things he has experienced and learned about in life. He left the church some time ago, and now considers himself a deist .

I can totally see his point. I can understand how he has arrived at this view of the world, and I can empathise with the experiences he’s had. But I don’t agree with his conclusions.

My major problem though, is that for the most part, I am completely unable to answer his questions, nor provide what he might consider to be a rational explanation for my belief. Even my first-hand experience is considered subjective and unreliable since it cannot be repeated nor proven. I’m fine with that. From my perspective, I know that it is not my job to defend God. That was never part of the job description. I need to be able to give an answer relating to why I believe, and I am required to love. So that’s what I do. I trust God to take care of the rest. He is happy for me to pray for him, and asks me to do so….so I do. A lot.

It’s not an easy place for me to be in, but I have to say that it has probably been the single most strengthening thing I’ve been through. And probably the best thing for my faith. I have had to think about exactly what I believe, and why. I have had to start exploring deeper and relying more heavily on God to guide me and encourage me.

Have I questioned the legitimacy and foundations of my faith? Of course. A well put, compelling argument that appears to make sense will, of course, make you think.

Have I thought about chucking in the towel?

Yup.

Some days it all seems like too much hard work.

So why do I keep going?

In my life I’ve experienced enough of God to be able to trust that what I don’t understand at this point is either discoverable, will be revealed at some point when I need to know, or I really don’t need to know. Just like Thomas, God has provided me with what I need to be able to trust at this point in time.

It’s about making a choice. You either trust God or you don’t. If you come to the conclusion that you can’t trust God…kill off your “faith” once and for all. Living with a foot in either camp “just in case” is deplorable to God (Revelations speaks of those who are lukewarm being spewed up and the Gospels talk of the impossibility of serving both God and Mammon). If you decide that you know enough about God for you to trust him, then jump in with both feet even if you don’t have all the answers and continue on with the life-long research project that is God.

I pray that if you are looking for answers that  God would give you exactly what you need to allow you to trust and move forward when the time is right.

Are you at a point where you aren’t sure if you can trust? Can I pray for you?

Freud said:          Being entirely honest with oneself is a good exercise.

Have you ever had questions about your faith? Have you ever wondered if its all just something someone made up? Have you ever wondered if all this church stuff is worth the effort? Have you ever wondered how the Bible is supposed to be the word of God if it is a bunch of books put together by some dusty academics a few hundred years ago? Have you ever wondered why God seems so different between the Old and New Testaments when he is supposed to be never-changing?

Have you ever felt guilty for thinking these things?

I have.

I grew up in a religious tradition where we were told what to believe and how to act, with little or no encouragement to think critically about faith matters. These questions were labelled as “doubts” and actively discouraged as sinful, or even pronounced as Satan whispering in your ear. So as I grew up and the questions continued to pop up I pushed those thoughts to the back and tried not to be a “doubting Thomas” even as I sang that quaint old Sunday school song of the same name.

As I got older I began to think that this line of teaching is not only dangerous and bordering on cult- like indoctrination, but it has produced generations of Christians who are unable to engage in intelligent discussion regarding faith matters, particularly if someone doesn’t agree with their point of view. (They tend to get angry and defensive rather than showing God’s grace.)  And yet questions are still actively discouraged in some quarters, so I was uneasy about the conclusions I had drawn, and happy to be taught that this was in fact the “right” way to do this God thing.

Imagine my surprise when I started reading my first theology textbook (Faith Seeking Understanding- Migliore), and within the first couple of pages it tells me that the Christian life is like a life-long research project where we MUST be continually asking questions or we risk becoming stale and forming incorrect ideas about God. I had been expecting wads of rigid dogma and doctrine, the relief that flooded my mind and my soul was palpable.

If we foster an environment where Christians, let alone non believers are unable to ask the curly questions, then we have a deeply unhealthy environment where growth is stifled, and the perception of Christians as suckers who put their brains in jars at the moment of salvation is perpetuated. As a result countless numbers of people turn from the church as they dare to ask questions and are told to “just have faith”, they need answers and they will go where they find them.

Questions are good. Questions are absolutely necessary, and handled properly, questions are how we grow. These questions in and of themselves are not sinful. What do you think will happen if you question or “doubt” God or your faith? Is he going to have a fit? Is he going to crumble under the pressure? Do you think its the first time he’s ever been confronted? I don’t think so.

In the next couple of posts I want to look at how Jesus dealt with questions, how being married to “doubting Thomas” has been a turning point in my relationship with God, how we can use questions to stretch and grow us, and how to deal with people who come to us with questions we perhaps don’t want to think about.

Do you have questions about God or your faith that bother you? How do you feel when these questions pop up in your life?

At the beginning of the year I set a series of specific goals and targets for 2010, with the aim to review and adjust as required at the end of each season. Here is the result of my first review. They are grouped into the broad categories that I have chosen to develop.

1. Family- I have been purposefully spending a lot more incidental time with my family, I’ve managed to have several individual outings with Sheldon, but have not been so successful with getting out with Aiden. Dates with Al have mostly consisted of trips to Bunnings and the odd mountain biking expedition, although now that our salsa lessons have started again, things will be more date-like. One goal was to take a quarterly family photo because I have spent the last 10 years dodging the camera and Al was concerned there weren’t many photos of us as a family. I ended up doing a photo shoot and got a series of great portraits of each of us.
2. Friends – I’ve been out with my girlfriends and am on target for entertaining in our home…I do however need to remember to arrange lunch dates with friends a bit more often.
3. Health- Completed 207kms of the target 1000kms on my bike so far, so that’s on target, but I’m not sure how that will go once the weather gets colder. Running goals started well but are flagging due to calf problems I’d like to see if I can push through and run a couple of fun runs this year, but happy to adjust and focus on cycling and weights if it doesn’t improve. I have added kettlebell weight training to my regime, so on the whole I am on target. I haven’t lost a whole lot of weight, but I’ve lost centimetres from my waist, arms and thighs. I think consistency in routines will see things moving more rapidly soon. Rest days have been a bit hit and miss – it has been a challenge to get all of my housework done on Saturdays to allow for a free day on Sunday…need to tweak my routines some more.
4. Spiritual – I’ve been working specifically on community and enjoying the developments. Other aspects are progressing well, some not so much, but will take the full year to play out.
5. Travel – On track for short and long trip planning, but I need to rethink when I intend to fly up to see my parents, they are unavailable at Easter when I had planned to zip up for a visit.
6. Learning – I’ve read five out of the target 26 books so far, and will be starting my first uni subject this week, so on track so far!
7. Writing- Woefully behind on this set of goals. Coupled with the ever increasing household activity calendar and full-time work I am finding that I am so tired at the end of the day that my brain is unwilling to cooperate. I think this is probably going to get worse as I get into my study. I need to investigate some strategies to get that moving, and reduce the scope of what I want to achieve.
8. Art/Creativity – I’m on track with a sketch per week and have almost finished a graphite portrait I’ve been working on for awhile. Basically on track, this is an optional one that I’m happy to let slide if I’m pushed for time, but will try to keep sketching and using visual techniques in my journal.
9. Financial – Saving – on track for this year’s cash on hand needs.
10. Financial – Giving – on track and feeling grateful that I am in a position to help people in need.
11. Service- one specific goal is wholly on track, the other two are pending and should be underway within the next quarter.

Summary
I’m pleasantly surprised with what I’ve managed to achieve so far this year. The only places that really need adjustment are my running goals, my writing goals and spending individual time with my oldest boy. I really thought I was further behind, so this has been an encouraging exercise.